Having Anxiety and still Being a Great Mom

One of the most difficult decisions I made as a mom was created because of the pandemic. It creates a significant amount of anxiety for me. Everyone has something they remember about the year 2020 and will probably talk about it as long as they live. In 2020, I had to face a tough decision that I could not procrastinate about or allow someone else to make for me.

Anxiety in real life

My husband and I had to decide about school for our 3 children.  At the time, their current ages were 10 years old, 7 years old, and 2 years old. Now, I am a professional and believe that I am accomplished in my profession. I am a pediatric physical therapist by training. I worked hard to achieve where I am in right now. I expect to continue to grow in what I do everyday; BUT I had a huge decision to make around this time last year that had nothing to do with my professional training and everything to do with being a mom.

• Where would we send our children for school in the upcoming school year?
• How do we make this decision?

I am the type of person that internalizes pressure and it can manifest as anxiety. This is not the best for anyone because of the cycle that your body goes through with anxiety, especially if the time it is experienced is prolonged.

Once anxiety starts, you can not turn it off until your body gains equilibrium again. There is a whole process. Now, learning your body’s responses can help you stop yourself before you start feeling anxious or help you aid your body in resolving the anxiousness faster but it still a process. You may already know this process as fight or flight mechanism.

Anxiety Response Illustrated

For an easy to follow description of the process in your body, check out this webpage.

Anxiety is a normal response to stress.

Women are more than twice as likely as men to get an anxiety disorder in their lifetime. Anxiety disorders are often treated with counseling, medicine, or a combination of both. Some women also find that yoga or meditation helps with anxiety disorders.

https://www.womenshealth.gov/mental-health/mental-health-conditions/anxiety-disorders

How I gain control when I feel anxious

I am a planner so with the pandemic giving everyone a great deal of uncertainty, I had to do a lot of evaluating and personal adjustments. We sought information from a variety of sources about schooling and Covid-19. I made a chart of questions to ask various schools when I called because we eventually decided on online school. But we didn’t know if we would use our local school system or another setting. 

• Would I be able to a homeschool in the tradition sense?
• How would my children take to being at home for school?

This decision had me going through so many scenarios in my mind over and over.  I was overwhelmed and felt alone. But I had to realize that any decision I made would be one that I would be able to get through and flourish in! That is when you are able to limit what anxiety can do to you in your current situation- when you decide to own your decisions and accept their consequences.

My thought processes

I always look back at things in life and think, “Why did I use all that time thinking so much about negative things or why something wouldn’t work out for me?” Sometimes I even try to stop myself while I am in the situation. In some situations, it is easier to do self talk.

Sometimes you can’t hear your voice over all the other noise that is going on.

Don’t feel alone! Many women think that they are the only person has these feelings. Or that everyone else has gotten over their challenges much quicker. Like you are the only one who is at this level of your career or where you are in being a mom.

YOU ARE NOT ALONE! We all have our challenges that we have to deal with. Everyday. Sometimes, it does look like someone else has it all going for them. But you don’t know how much work they already put into the situation to make it appear so easy!

Resources for you

• Anxiety Disorders Among Women: A Female Lifespan Approach Study looking at how anxiety affects women throughout the lifespan. This resource will give you information about yourself and also your daughter, since it goes through development.
• Personal stories from different women who face anxiety These stories come from women who experience anxiety in various forms. You may be able to relate directly with one of them.
• Being a parent with anxiety All parents experience some sort of anxiety. This illustrates ways you can cope each day doing daily activities.
• Website with quick test You can take that will estimate your susceptibility to anxiety and aids you in finding resources. I took the test in about 4 minutes without giving any personal information and received my results immediately. It provides you with a nice synopsis at the end.
• Here is an infographic I located from Northwestern Medicine. It gives a great visual! It provides you with some take aways about your body and its processes.

If your mental state of anxiety paralyzes your ability to make decisions or participate in everyday tasks, let someone know or make contact with the phone number below. Additional help is available. You don’t have to do it alone.

National Alliance on Mental Illness

• If you or someone you know is struggling with their mental health, seek help. If it is an emergency, call 911.
• If you are looking for assistance that is non-emergent, reach out to the National Alliance on Mental Illness https://www.nami.org/help. The NAMI HelpLine can be reached Monday through Friday, 10 a.m.–8 p.m., ET.
• 1-800-950-NAMI (6264) or info@nami.org
• You can also text NAMI at Text NAMI to 741-741.
• Connect with a trained crisis counselor to receive free, 24/7 crisis support via text message.

Your thoughts

Have you ever been in a situation where your anxiety has taken over? 

What did you do?

Please share in the comments. Your experience may help someone else more than you ever know.

If you are interested in the home school decision making chart I made, email me at hello@theshannajanel.com and I will send you a copy!

I have found that this stress relieving lotion works wonders for me because of the scent. I just use it on my hands throughout the day and it helps relax my mental state. Using your sense of smell can assist you in achieving a calm state sometimes.

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I am so glad you took the time to read this post! I hope you found it insightful and located some information that can assist you in flourishing everyday.

Be you, be focused, be well!

Find Your Flourish! |Shanna|

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